Dear Sara, We all make judgments based on our own experience.You had too much going on during your divorce to possibly consider dating. This same script, I’m reminded, played out in the life of one of my favorite clients who fell in love with a separated man.
All this information came up over the course of our 10-hour date, and to some extent, the process of James discussing it was akin to someone waving a red flag in my face. The point of course is this: There are some serious pros to dating a divorced guy. The Cons: (I thought we’d get the negatives out of the way first. ” You’ll have to manage her continued pining, her continued pursuit. You will see him see old photos, you will see him cry or scream or fume or mourn. And – lest it bears mention – this is all as much fun as… A guy who’s lived with a woman for a significant period of time has a pretty good sense of what to say and when to say it. If you’re boyfriend’s divorced, you can be 99 percent sure he’s lived with someone else for a while and has a solid understanding of shared space as a result. A divorce is a horrible thing to be sure, but from what I’ve observed, it’s also pretty humbling.
I thought we were on the road to “happily ever after.” After several years, he just couldn’t commit to marriage. Some singles will not date a man or woman whose status is “separated.” While there isn’t a category of “separated, divorce pending” to select from, if you are not legally divorced, you are still married and may be unavailable. More often than not, a transition relationship will run its course. It is more common in cases of a difficult divorce than in an amicable divorce or the loss of a spouse.
The guy who broke my heart couldn’t imagine life without me. I know of many happily married couples that met shortly after one’s spouse had passed away.
When it comes to family, and children, let your boyfriend decide when and how interactions will occur.
Currently, I am using online dating to meet new prospects, though I choose not to date anyone who is going through divorce.